Mindfulness

I always thought mindfulness was purely focussing on the now and not letting your emotions or worries about the past or future get to your mind. As I started to read more into it, I found out it’s something else. Actually it’s everything I’ve been writing about so far, and more.

 

I just finished reading the Dutch book ‘Mindfulness: een praktische training in het omgaan met gevoelens en gewoonten’ by psychotherapist Ger Schurink. If you can read Dutch, I recommend this book.  With ‘no-nonsense’  and no difficult spiritual terms, the concept can be understood by anybody. If you can’t read Dutch, there are tons of books out there on this matter so no worries!

What’s mindfulness about?

According to the book mindfulness is all about attention and focus. You’re actively aware of what comes to your senses and your thoughts. Keep an open mind and allow whatever comes to you through your senses and thoughts to be there for now. Experience what you’re going through right this second from a neutral position.

For instance, if you feel stress on your chest, don’t judge that, don’t try to push it away and don’t try to find a solution. Notice it’s there and just let it be. Let it breathe. When you do this you create space within yourself.

That space – or calmness – will help you deal with bad feelings, emotions and behavior you want to change. It’s about detecting paradigms and freeing yourself from them. There’s a formula in the book that is simple but very true:

Suffering = pain x resistance

The book offers you steps to recognize those negative patterns and name them so you understand what they are and where they come from. When you gain more knowledge about your patterns, it’s easier to break through and change them. Funnily the way to change them is a way I described before: by reacting the exact opposite way as you’re used to. Replace it with wished behavior. Often the unwished behavior is activated by certain situations. By getting to know your paradigm, you can anticipate and think about how you’d like to deal with the situation the next time it pops up.

The author mentions that when you change such deep rooted believes it can cause an emotional reaction, but don’t give up! That’s just a sign it’s working. Every big change needs some time to get accustomed to.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This blog is a short summary. To learn more about the charts and tools mister Schurink offers to change paradigms and learn to be mindful, you can buy his book. There are audio exercises that come with the book.

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